Shhh! Secret Life of a Princess

Random, provoking thoughts from a self-confessed princess :: with focus on motivational learnings from the media. I hope to inspire everyone to be the best they can be

Friday, April 18, 2008

Story of An Introvert and More

I learnt a new word today from watching Lars and the Real Girl, acted brilliantly by Ryan Gosling, winning a few awards for his believable potrayal of a lonely introvert. The word is 'decompensating'. It's definition?

When the world has let you down and you do not know what to do to make things better, you shut yourself from the world. It is safer for you not to feel anything than to be hurt over and over again. This can be seen from the characteristics of someone who blinks his eyes incessantly, trying to have as little view of the real world as possible. It is seldom of their choice to be an introvert but circumstances around them has made them cold, afraid to feel passion and afraid to face the real world as it might hurt them in the long run. A hard brick wall built around them protects them from the dangers of the chaotic, harsh and fickle world. Wanting everything under their own control, they get frustrated when things do not happen as they hoped for or envisioned. Most times, they feel abstinence, unable to feel the same euphoria and happiness that everyone else can feel, unable to smile when everyone laughs, unable to lead a normal life others can lead. They feel uncomfortable in a crowded setting even though they wished they could be like the famous, charming, suave person in the centre of attention.

It is with this intention that made Lars invented a version of himself in the form of a girlfriend, a sex doll he purchased from the Internet. The girlfriend became his outlet to vent his anger and frustration, his muse to show the world how he would treat someone had he been given the chance to fall in love and an ear for him to tell his problems and fears to. Being abandoned since young and not being taken care of, he showed signs of 'decompensating' where years of accumulated loneliness and frustration has turned him into someone deprived of love and compassion but so needing them at the same time.

It made me think that everyone decompensates in their own way, difference is how big the accumulation of emotions is. Those with pent-up frustration tend to be those who are silent, introverts who sacrifices for others and unable to voice their wants and needs. As a result, they decompensate in a different way letting out their emotions in a way considered abnormal.

With what most people will use to release pent up sex desires, positioning the doll in various karmic ways and releasing pleasure through the doll, Lars on the other hand, used the doll to release his pent up emotions, using the doll as a reflection of himself. The doctor did a great job exploring him through his doll, accepting that what he does is normal to help him gain normalcy.

I do feel like I gained a bit of excerpt of how an introvert thinks and feels as I have never been in the position of one. However, what touched me about the movie is what harm 'decompensating' can do to anyone and once accumulated, gets harder to resolve. Thus, communication is key.

2 Bowed to the princess

  • At 2:45 PM, Blogger Nee Sern said…

    Hey I watched this movie too! I thought it was quite cute but the pacing was a bit lagging...

  • At 1:33 AM, Anonymous patrick said…

    just saw Lars and the Real Girl, Gosling did a great job playing out his character's psychological transitions... it was considerate of the movie's producers to leave out the predictable small-town drama as well


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